I needed this.

It felt like it had been so long. I ached for it, I craved it and good lord how I missed it.

Then you came along and gave me everything I needed. And, well, you just fit so perfectly inside of me and it’s so satisfying, ya know? Every contour and every ridge, you were there complementing them and it felt like home. That last one–well, he turned up missing one day, never to be seen or heard from again. I was devastated. He disappeared bruised and beaten, but it had been four years. I needed to try out someone else anyway. How are you supposed to know what you want if you don’t go around a time or two? It’s just that, well, I got so used to the him being around all the time. I took him for granted. I just expected he would be right where I left him, no questions asked. And when he wasn’t, my whole world turned upside down. He’d come to bed with me and not badger me about my day, he would just accept it and we would fall fast asleep together. Not to mention, he always made me smile when I woke up realizing he was still right there with me. You know what I’m talking about? It’s comforting.

You see, we knew so much about each other. We were there through thick and thin. Sometimes he would go M.I.A. for awhile, but he just needed some reassurance that I would work hard to get him back. And I would. My parents always encouraged me to do so; they liked him too, because he really did keep me in line. He was good for me. He hadn’t worn out his welcome, so I am unsure as to why he left. I was pretty sure we were in this for the long haul, but I guess somethings aren’t meant to be.

But now there is you. And you’re special. You haven’t gone through the ringer a time or two with me yet, so you’re fresh and new. But don’t worry, you’ll have scratches when I’m done with you because I like to get rough. Real rough. My parents weren’t too happy about me moving on so quickly, but it needed to be done. I mean, my God, look at you–you’re perfection, who doesn’t want to get their mouth around you? I just can’t believe how well you fit inside of me, it’s so tight. It’s everything I dreamed of. You’re everything I dreamed of. Being with you feels like home.

I Heart My New Retainer! <3

He’s so shiny, you can’t even see him!

I also love double entendres.